Thursday, January 08, 2009

Dear Jo-ann,

Dear Jo-ann,

I am writing to let you know that your fabric store has gone severely 'down the toilet'. I went there last night with three children while my fourth one was at an appointment. I had approximately 1.25 hours to spend in your store. In the form of reality I chose to live in this should be ample time to buy the things on my list which was:

5 yards of fabric for backing a quilt
1 spool bobbin thread for embroidery machine
1 package of Avocado Cucumber soap
1 art item for Rylin to buy with the allowance that is burning a hole in his pocket

Your store was not busy in the least. (If you are easily offended by any kind of discrimination go away now this is fair warning) I walked into the store grabbed my buggy placed smallest child in said buggy and proceeded into the store. Glanced at bin right there in main aisle and picked up one package of Christmas labels for $.30, made note to self that I need to store these somewhere that will make me recall next Christmas that I own these and do not need to buy them. I then proceeded to go to the thread section... it wasn't where I left it. It had gone away. I walked around the store trying to locate where an entire retail section could have gone off to. I eventually found it behind the cutting table (where the people cut your yard goods for you) I thought to myself, "Well this has got to be dumbest place to put this as on Saturday or sale days when this place gets busy and the line is all over the place to get your fabric cut you will have to push, shove and physically harm folks to get a spool of thread." So I got my thread, went straight to the back of the store and started looking through the quilting fabrics. Everytime I found something I liked that was the right price there wasn't enough left on the bolt. I finally found a fabric that was acceptable, apeared to have just enough fabric on it and that was not priced so that I would have to chose between finishing my quilt and feeding my beloved offspring. So off we go to the cutting table.

As I walk up there 3 people waiting. A man with a huge pole with home dec fabric on it. A woman with a child wearing a cow boy hat in the front of the cart and a new baby in a infant carrier in the back, Finn declared, "That's a nice baby." You know, like you would say about someone's new car or truck. Then there was a lady with a cart full of pillow forms and fabric & trims to be bought to cover them. So now we have our setting. Also, your store has recently implemented a number pull thing like the deli at the grocery store. The 3 children and I stroll up I pull a number from the pole and look up. They are on #74 I am #79.

The man with the home decor fabric is first. His huge pole of fabric is laying all across the cutting counter. The woman behind the counter who is aproximately eleventy hundred years old and due to her advanced age may be hard of hearing, I will give her that... is apparently not qualified to cut home dec fabric, this is out of her job description and in no way will she attempt such a feat and will not be convinced. I know this because she is loudly telling the man, "I'LL TELL YOU WHAT THE ONLY WAY YOU ARE GOING TO GET HER BACK HERE IS TO GO UP TO CUSTOMER SERVICE AND COMPLAIN ABOUT HER! I'VE ALREADY CALLED HER TWICE ON THIS HEADSET AND SHE HASN'T COME BACK HERE YET." The man walks away leaving his 6ft fabric pole on the cutting counter and comes back. "DID YOU GO UP THERE?" The crone says. The man nods. "WELL, SHE'S NOT HERE AND IT'S BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T TALK TO A MANAGER DID YOU?" (In the meantime Rylin is dancing around demanding to know when we can go to the toy aisle, Franklin is sighing and starting to wander off and Finn is telling me he wants to go home.) I discretely tell them, "A few more minutes," and contemplate how I can jump the counter, grab the scissors out of the crones hands and bump her out of the way with my ample hips and cut the stupid fabric. Then she pipes up again,"WELL, I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY EXPECT THIS STORE TO RUN IF NO ONE IS GOING TO DO THEIR JOB." I contemplate what I could use the scissors for before cutting the fabric... it involves this person's tongue. (Frankie and Rylin are looking up at me with their eyes all wide in the way that children do when they come into contact with crazy folk and want assurance it's going to be alright. I wink at them, which is the universal symbol for "it's all good" and make sure I do not smirk cause if I do, they will laugh, then I will laugh and then Ole' Miss Crazy is going to know we're onto her we don't want that because the scissors apear to be sharpish.) So as she's saying this in the loud voice I hear from the next aisle, "I'm here. You can stop now." It is the long awaited employee with the mad home decor fabric cuttin' skillz. Ole Miss Crazy says,"Ok, good." Very quietly, she looked rather red faced and her total demeaner changed." I turned my head and met the eyes of the owner of the 'nice baby' and we both had the very tight faces of people who are putting all their might into not laughing out loud.

The newly arrived employee who is only about ten hundred years old as oposed to eleventy, goes over to the very patient if frightened man and begins cutting his fabric. Ole' Miss takes the fabric & corded trims of the pillow form lady, she asks the woman how much of each trim she needs and the woman says,"I'm not sure I need it to go all the way around the pillow form..." Miss Crazy says loudly, "WELL, YOU NEED TO DECIDE HOW MUCH YOU NEED I CAN'T DECIDE THAT FOR YOU!!!" The woman shamefacedly mumbles something along the lines of, "well I've never done this before..." I look into her cart at the pillow forms and say, "I would do 2 yards per each pillow." She looks at me gratefully and seemed to relax a bit, no longer looking like someone shamed and put on the spot and tells the crone what to cut. New employee finished with the man and started cutting nice baby's fabric, ok I was next please let me get new employee please... Ole Miss says," 76? 76? 77? 77? 78? 78? 78?" I pipe in and Rylin is now sitting on the filthy tile floor and I can't take much more of this. "They probably couldn't stand the wait time and left, I'm number 79." I step up put my bolt of fabric down and said, "5 yards." She unwraps the bolt with her witch like claws 5 yards takes me just a bit shy of the end of the bolt and as she goes to look up I say, "Yes, I'll take what's left." So she says, "WELL, I'LL NEED TO REMEASURE TO SEE HOW MUCH MORE THAT IS." Ok, so she measured five yards, looked up at me and now has to remeasure the entire thing simply because she looked away. She's remeasuring get's to the end and says," 1/4 yard" I look down and say, "No, I don't think so." She looks down at the fabric, I look down at the fabric, I say,"That is less than 1/4 I can see it from here." She looks at me distrustingly like I just told her I could see her girdle under her clothes. "IT LOOKS LIKE 1/4 TO ME!" I said, "Just give me the five yards then, I will not pay for what I am not getting. Please, make sure you cut it even as I will need all of it." She says,"I'll just give you the whole thing and put 1/8 yard remnant on there for the end of the bolt?" I look at her and say very nicely, "Since it's 1/8 yard it sounds good to me." I take my fabric and walk away. Meanwhile my cell phone had rang about 4 times because Bob was calling I picked up and said, "Call you back in ten minutes."

I look at my watch we've been here an hour already. We run to get the soap, then to the art aisle where I tell Rylin to pick quickly. And he says,"Stop rushing me." There were not prices on the shelves or products anywhere!!! We get up to the counter and I look at the two cashiers one is high school age the other is elderly. I'm noticing a trend...
We pay. We leave. I call Bob back, he says,"What is your problem?" I explain to him what I'd just witnessed and endured. He says, "Maybe you should get a job there." I said,"I've applied there before they weren't interested." He says, "So they hire people who cannot competantly cut fabric and they weren't interested in you." I said, "No. I figured it out. They do not hire women of child bearing age. Every employee was either too old by far or too young. They had said that they'd keep my application on file, they'll call when I'm Medicare eligible."

So, Jo-ann what I am thinking is this: #1 - You do not hire women who have children if you can help it because inevitably these sorts of women will be required to leave early or call in due to a sick child etc. as you cannot ask, "Do you have children?" by law you simply do not hire anyone of a certain age. Other than that your standards regarding your employees seem a bit lax to say the least. #2 - You in no way screen your employees for any kind of customer service skills or even plain old manners. #3 - You do not verify that they are capable of cutting in a straight line or have the ability to cross train between regular fabric and home dec fabric. I cannot positively say that this is what you are doing but that's where the evidence leads me. I am not going to say, "Don't hire this sort of people." That would not be right. I'm just saying do not hire people and then put them into positions they cannot fulfill. I don't care if you hire orange Oooompa Loompas as long as they understanding the first grade skills of measuring and cutting accurately. Futhermore, stop moving things around. I am not comfortable with change. Put the thread back where it goes.... everything else too, I couldn't find a price for one single thing because when they got moved the prices did not follow them to their new shelves perhaps that would be a fitting job for the crone instead interacting with people.

Should the employee I've complained about in this letter decide to gather her coven together and take action to harm me, let her know I have $4000.00 eyes and I'll see them coming and she was right I can also see her girdle...

I will be calling your store and speaking to the manager today. I thought a fabric store was the sort of place where you could take your impressionable children and not have them pick up rude, nasty habits such as verbally slamming a co-worker in front of a whole slew of customers, or listen to your mother get that slightly threatening tone in her voice while speaking about yard goods. And it is a wonderful thing that they couldn't read my mind where in there was a picture of me leaning over the counter and snatching someone up by their purple polo shirt.

Lastly, please tear up the application I have submitted. I do not think I have the sort of tolerance required to work with your existing employees around sharp objects, I would probably go all crazy in my mind (seems to be a bit catching there) and label the scissor section"Shanks" and relocate those long poles that hold the Home Decor fabric some place very inconvenient. It's best I look for employment elsewhere, you continue getting your day labor from the asylum as you have been doing.


Regards,
Jessica Wandtke

P.S. You were having a big yarn sale but I didn't buy any because I spent all my time waiting at the cutting counter.

2 comments:

Marsel said...

Snicker, snicker...it's definitely a universal JoAnn's thing.

I (and I know you are, too) am very fond of elderly ladies. HOWEVER, I do prefer (although it's very picky of me, I know) that the lady cutting my fabric be capable of seeing the fabric, hearing how much I need, AND holding the scissors steadily enough to be able to cut my piece without a 1/4 yard variance from beginning to end.

Especially on my plaid fabric.

Delighted Hands said...

Yes, incompetence rules in most retail stores but it is so awful when it infiltrates our sacred fabric walls......!